Post by Erutanie on Feb 12, 2005 0:28:23 GMT -5
it's the humor section, so i decided to post my satire poem:
Once, on a day far, far long ago,
There lived a hobbit on Bagshot Row.
The hobbit owned a beautiful thing;
It was thought to be an evil ring.
That’s a lie as you will see, the object
Was not just demented project.
The hobbit’s Frodo Baggins, they say.
Frodo was a little bored one day.
He took two friends and a servant
To go with him on a pointless errant.
They wanted to see most of Middle
Earth. The used the prize of a riddle
Contest to plan their journey long.
They went to Bree and sang a song.
There, they kidnapped a poor ranger;
This ranger was total stranger.
The trip was secret all the way to
Rivendell, the home of the elves who
Strongly believed in small magic rings.
They made new friends and packed many things.
Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Strider,
Legolas, Gandalf the Grey Rider,
Boromir, and Gimli were the nine
Who soon would not be completely fine.
The nine pretended that the ring had
Powers. The tale from here is quite sad.
Their path had led them to Moria,
Where Gandalf Grey had hysteria.
Gone he was, so they continued on,
On to Lorien where they did pawn
Gandalf’s luggage, for they were very
Greedy. Then robbed the elves, the hairy
Elves who had gave them a place to sleep.
For their crimes, they did not ever weep.
Frodo and Sam, however, did not
Approve of what the five had not bought.
They went their way and thought no more of
The dishonest members who could’ve
Left the good elves alone at their homes
To continue to write their satire poems.
Now, do you remember that riddle
Contest where Frodo got a middle
Finger ring? Well, now Sméagol Gollum
Really wanted to say to ’em,
And wanted to show them how to get
(First had to promise not to forget)
A high price for the ring on Mount Doom.
Mount Doom is like E-Bay in a room
Full of volcano artifacts from
Volcanoes. They needed to eat some
Lembas, and rand into the leader
Of the band of Spider-Speeder.
The big leader’s name was Old Shelob.
(She wanted to eat a shish kabob.)
They stole her new car and drove on
To Mount Doom, and there they did pawn
That worthless ring to Molten Fire,
Who broke the ring atop his tire.
The two went home and on the way,
Met their companions who did say,
“Where did you go? Why did you leave us?”<br>The two will never tell because
They lost the money they made to orcs
In a gambling game of tossing porks.
Frodo then sailed away on a ship.
Boy, he thought he was really quite hip.
The moral here is do not gamble,
And never trust a hobbit’s ramble.
Once, on a day far, far long ago,
There lived a hobbit on Bagshot Row.
The hobbit owned a beautiful thing;
It was thought to be an evil ring.
That’s a lie as you will see, the object
Was not just demented project.
The hobbit’s Frodo Baggins, they say.
Frodo was a little bored one day.
He took two friends and a servant
To go with him on a pointless errant.
They wanted to see most of Middle
Earth. The used the prize of a riddle
Contest to plan their journey long.
They went to Bree and sang a song.
There, they kidnapped a poor ranger;
This ranger was total stranger.
The trip was secret all the way to
Rivendell, the home of the elves who
Strongly believed in small magic rings.
They made new friends and packed many things.
Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Strider,
Legolas, Gandalf the Grey Rider,
Boromir, and Gimli were the nine
Who soon would not be completely fine.
The nine pretended that the ring had
Powers. The tale from here is quite sad.
Their path had led them to Moria,
Where Gandalf Grey had hysteria.
Gone he was, so they continued on,
On to Lorien where they did pawn
Gandalf’s luggage, for they were very
Greedy. Then robbed the elves, the hairy
Elves who had gave them a place to sleep.
For their crimes, they did not ever weep.
Frodo and Sam, however, did not
Approve of what the five had not bought.
They went their way and thought no more of
The dishonest members who could’ve
Left the good elves alone at their homes
To continue to write their satire poems.
Now, do you remember that riddle
Contest where Frodo got a middle
Finger ring? Well, now Sméagol Gollum
Really wanted to say to ’em,
And wanted to show them how to get
(First had to promise not to forget)
A high price for the ring on Mount Doom.
Mount Doom is like E-Bay in a room
Full of volcano artifacts from
Volcanoes. They needed to eat some
Lembas, and rand into the leader
Of the band of Spider-Speeder.
The big leader’s name was Old Shelob.
(She wanted to eat a shish kabob.)
They stole her new car and drove on
To Mount Doom, and there they did pawn
That worthless ring to Molten Fire,
Who broke the ring atop his tire.
The two went home and on the way,
Met their companions who did say,
“Where did you go? Why did you leave us?”<br>The two will never tell because
They lost the money they made to orcs
In a gambling game of tossing porks.
Frodo then sailed away on a ship.
Boy, he thought he was really quite hip.
The moral here is do not gamble,
And never trust a hobbit’s ramble.
